Jack's weird day
by Mimi Sakura
Summary: I had way to much sugar when I wrote this....you have been warned. Please read and review : )


Jack's weird day  
  
  
Jack yawned stretching his arms as he woke up, the first thing he noticed was that he legs where cold and he glanced down at himself confused and screamed.  
  
"HOW DID THIS DRESS GET ON ME!?"   
  
"Can you not try a scream so loud, your giving me a headache." His dog asked looking at him from where he laid on the carpet eating Jack's morning breakfast.  
  
"Oh, sorry Bubbles." Jack pauses for a moment. "Hey! Wait a minuet...dogs don't talk!"  
  
Jack looks back at his dog threw huge shocked eyes.  
  
"What--?" Bubbles barked.  
  
"Um...nothing..." Jack slowly backed up towards the door and then ran out with a scream.  
  
"Uoff!" He gasped as he ran into someone.  
  
"Oh, Harris! I'm sorry!" Jack apologized quickly.  
  
"How dare you knock me down!?" Harris growled his eyes glowing with the madness of a manic.   
  
Jack backed up in fear.  
  
"And for that I give you the ultimate evil! Your TAX bill!! Mawhahahahahaha!!!!" Harris laughed insanely throwing tax bills up into the air and vanishes in a puff of smoke.  
  
Jack blinked in confusion and slowly picked up one of the tax bills. "900000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" Jacks faints and wakes up an hour later to find Karen standing over him.  
  
"Karen! Thank god! Something insane is happening!" Jack began.  
  
"Oh, something is troubling you, Ohh, your look so cute in a dress, my little Jackie wacky! The love of my life, the one thingy I luv better then even wine."  
  
Jack's eyes bulged out of his head as he saw Karen standing their wearing gigantic pink baby clothes and a baby bottle filled with wine in her hands.  
  
'She must be really drunk....' Jack thought. Then suddenly Karen begins to cry.  
  
"I WET MY DIAPER!!! WAHHHHHH!!!!!"  
  
Jack's eyes go huge as he turns bright red in the face and runs away.  
  
  
He enters flower bud village gasping for breath.  
  
"DEATH TO ALL!! MAWHAHAHA!!!" Leila ran threw the village naked laughing at the top of her lungs.  
  
".... Kay..."  
  
"Kill...Kill...Kill..." Popuri's father walked threw the village with a spray can of plant killer in his hands spraying all the flowers.  
  
Wanting to get away from Popuri's crazed parents he dashed into the bakery and was greeted by Ellie who actually looked normal!  
  
"Ellie, do you know what's going on hear!?" Jack gasped grasping the girl's shoulders.  
  
"Jack...I have something to tell you..." Ellie began.  
  
"Yeah? What is it." Jack asked concerned.  
  
Ellie paused for a moment then...  
  
"I WAS BORN A MAN!!!"  
  
Jack fell to his knees. "...Can this day get any weirder...?"  
  
He should have known not to ask because at that moment the bedroom door burst open to reveal Ellie's grandma wearing a sailor moon outfit.  
  
"IN THE NAME OF THE MOON I SHALL PUNSIH YOU!!!ACK!! HEART ATTACK!!" The old lady fell to the ground dead.  
  
Jack took this time to escape.  
  
Just as he ran threw the door he ran into his girl friend Popuri.  
  
"Popuri, what's going on around hear!?" Jack gasped.  
  
"Hi, My name is Popuri!" Popuri smiled.  
  
"Um....Popuri...?"  
  
"I like flowers."  
  
"Are you ok...?"  
  
"Please visit our shop!"  
  
"Popuri can you answer me! Do you know what's going on!?" Jack asked losing his temper.  
  
"Hi, my name is Popuri!"  
  
"......"  
  
"I like flowers."  
  
"......"  
  
"Please visit our shop!"  
  
"Gah!" Jack moaned pushing Popuri to the side then suddenly the bakery master pops out!  
  
"Jeff! Thank god! Do you---"  
  
"Brains....brains....brains..." Jeff repeated walked around with his hands out in front of him like a zombie.  
  
Jack watching with a blank look on his face as Jeff walked up to Popuri still repeating  
  
"Brains."   
  
"Hi my name is Popuri!"   
  
Jeff tapped on her head in confusion.  
  
"I like flowers."  
  
Jeff looked inside of her ears and began to inspect the rest of her head.  
  
"Please visit our shop!"  
  
Jeff moaned pushing her onto the ground and walked off muttering "brains, brains..."  
  
"Where can I go to escape the insanity? I know the church!!" Jack ran towards the church but froze in his tracks as he opened the door.  
  
The kids May, Stu, and Kent where dancing around a burning pillar of books.  
  
"MAWHAHAHA WE SACERFICE THESE BOOKS TO STATN SO THE DARK MASTER SHALL RULE US ONCE AGAIN MAWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!" The priest laughed insanely.  
  
Jack slowly backed out of the church.  
  
  
"Maria! She'll know what's going on!" Jack told himself as he opened the door to the library and saw Maria setting behind the desk looking normal.  
  
"Maria!! You wont believe what's going on---!!"  
  
"I WANT A BABY!!" Maria suddenly shouted standing up to reveal that she wasn't wearing anything.  
  
Jack backed up blushing as red as a strawberry. 'M...M...Maria?"  
  
"MAKE OUT WITH ME!!" Maria cried jumping on top of him and began ripping off his dress with her bare hands.  
  
Jack was panic; he was going to be raped by Maria! His hands felt for something to knock her off of him with and finally they got hold of a book and he smashed it down over her head.  
  
Maria was thrown back but not hurt as she looked at the thick fairy tale book and then smiled hugging it close to her.  
  
"I just love going to bed with a good book...."  
  
Jack quickly ran away.  
  
"Ok...the mayor was always weird...maybe he'll be normal." Jack reasoned as he opened the door to the mayor's house.  
  
"OH JACK!" The mayors wife came up to him her eyes filled with tears.  
  
"What's wrong?' Jack asked worriedly.  
  
"...I JUST DICOVERED...THAT THE MAYOR IS MY...'LONG LOST BROTHER!!'"  
  
Jack blinked at her for a few seconds. "Um...yeah...."  
  
At that moment the Mayor enters the room. "I shall get revenge on this town, I shall raise taxes, Mawhahahahahaha!!!"  
  
"I guess the explains my tax bill...." Jack muttered and left the house before more weirdness could happen.  
  
"Hey! Jack!" The potion shop owner called to him as he passed.  
  
'Hey! He sounds normal!' Jack thought. "Yeah?" he asked hopeful that someone was left with a brain besides himself.  
  
"Have you seen any poison mushrooms?"  
  
"No...why?"  
  
"Oh, I'm just bored of making medicine to help people, I want to try to make something new, how about medicine to kill people...?"  
  
Jack walked away from the old man feeling rather disturbed.  
  
  
"Where can I go now? Not the vineyard... Karen is probably there...the only place left is green farm." Jack headed towards green farm.  
  
Ann was walking around the farm wearing a huge pink dress.  
  
"Umm...Ann?" He asked shocked.   
  
"Hi!!" Ann giggled. "Aren't I so beautiful! And isn't my hair pretty?"  
  
"Yeah, I guess...Ann, what's going on?"  
  
"Oh...nothing honey, I was just so tired of looking like a tom-boy."  
  
"Hey, Ann, why aren't your animals out?" Jack asked looking around not seeing any sheep or cows or even horses around.  
  
"EWW!! Those fitly creatures!! Like, that is, like so gross!! I hate them!! Yukie! The only thing I like about them is the way they taste...yum...."  
  
Ann spaces out and begins to drool.  
  
Jack runs away and head towards the beach.  
  
"Oh no!" Jack gasped backing up as he saw Gary standing at the edge of the water.  
  
"Jack!" Gary gasped. "Oh, thanks god, I thought you where one of them."  
  
"You mean, your still normal?" Jack asked slowly walking towards him.  
  
"Yes...we have to find out what's going on. Is there anything weird at your farm?"  
  
"Well...my dog talks, there was Karen wearing a baby clothes but I think she's probably gone by now."  
  
"Ok, lets go. We have to plan something." Gary said yanking Jack towards his farm.  
  
  
"Well, at least the dog is not still in the house..." Jack began but froze as he heard the door to his house lock.  
  
"What the--?" Jack began looking over at Gary who smirked at him seductively.  
  
"Gary..." Jack stuttered.  
  
"Jack, did I ever tell you I love you?"  
  
Jack was now frozen by horror.  
  
"Your so cute in that dress." Gary giggled kneeling down beside him.  
  
"...Eh...eh....eh..." Jack trembled. "Your joking....right?"  
  
"No, my love, if I was joking would I do this?"   
  
Jack suddenly found Gary kissing him passionately.  
  
Everything that happened after that was a blur because he fainted.  
  
  
"Urgh..." Jack moaned as he opened his eyes. "It was all a dream?" the young man looked around himself in confusion.  
  
Jack then began to laugh. "What a weird dream! I must have been working to hard!"  
  
Jack threw his blankets off and then froze in horror.  
  
"ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"  
  
  
He was wearing a dress.  
  
  
The End.  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
